The Last Story [Video Game Review]

More like THE SHITTIEST GAME.

Why this game is shit:

1. Combat is done by moving towards the enemy and, nope, that’s it!

Pressing one button sometimes to provoke or block doesn’t really count as gameplay.

2. The cutscenes were done well for Japanese voice actors to sync with, the lip shapes and flaps are actually realistically done – again, for Japanese. Which just makes it horrible in English because you can’t sync a different language to how people move their mouths to pronounce Japanese. People are also constantly gabberin to they m8s about jibba jabbin around the swabbly bobblys all while the mouths arent even open, or are completely quiet when they are flappin all over. And no, it doesn’t have the JP audio track.

3. Everyone talks like this:

ill smak yu rite in da gabber m8 i swear on me mum ya limey cunt

4.

5. All the guys wear women’s clothes, one even has open chaps with his thighs out in the open and his cock loosely being held back by underwear and nothing else. I made sure to turn the cock blocker pink to bring the attention of the entire town directly towards it.

6. Trying to go past an enemy is impossible because THE MOVE BUTTON IS THE ATTACK BUTTON.

Don’t play this game. Don’t play Xenoshit Chronicles either. Play a real game like Xenosaga or Tales of Graces F or the wonderful Atelier Ayesha or even fucking Final Fantasy 13 I don’t care just not this. Don’t even bother trying to defend it, I’m usually open to talking but no – if you like this or Xenoblade Chronicles you’re wrong and are part of the casual #suchanerd #gamer crowd ruining modern video games.

0/10

worse than xenoblade

I truly hope The Last Story keeps to it’s name.