Coffee Samurai Review

This is a short little 30 minute ONA from ComixWave that makes me wonder about the current state of Korea. It’s not the fact a samurai is reborn in modern times as a vending machine, no, I can overlook that – it’s an anime so that’s nothing too out there.


What does bother me is the fact that almost every person living in this town is stoned out of their fucking minds. They first pull it off as “drunk” but it’s clearly beyond anything that would ever cause (most drunks don’t typically steal vending machines off the street, take them home, and then try to sleep with them), then the writers just say “fuck it” and even normal sober people with their families are clearly unable to really understand a single thing going on around them at all and just go with the flow because they are probably flying around in the sky on the back of a vending machine in their minds. Or, like the main girl, are literally¬† doing exactly that. While listening to her pirated music on her cheap bootleg iPod, no less. There’s a vocal insert song during the scene and everything.

But it’s exactly those things that make this charming, funny, and overall a fun watch. The story is fine and cute and has some sweet moments, but the characters and the things going on really make it good.

Hey kids, lets go to the park and you can do that little fake animal ride thing they have there. Okay, mom! Oh, it just got up and started talking to a vending machine that’s carrying around a sword? Well, son, I guess time’s up so stop being a bother and get off his back, and here’s your money, see you again next time zebra. Not a hint of hesitation or surprise, or worry, or even just a sign that she was pretending to be calm while freaking out inwardly. No, she just saw this as a normal daily thing even with her kids in danger.

Oh shit, that car is about to fly into that girl! Oh, that vending machine she was walking on a leash just cut it in half with an umbrella. Well, whatever, I’ve got shit to do. Goddamn I want some coffee.

A fucking group of polar bear samurai kidnap the girl, and what’s she do when mr.vending machine shows up? Tells him how they feel even more fluffy than she imagined. Are you KIDDING me, woman? This whole fucking town needs some serious goddamn help. And then the bears proceed to drink coffee out of him like nothing is fucking happening out of place.

I don’t really know what to say about this, but it’s worth watching.

Actually, thinking back, at the start of the show someone litters and leaves their trash on top of the samurai vending machine. If you ask me he’s been poisoning the coffee with some highly potent drugs to get back at them for not properly disposing of their trash. This somehow makes more sense than a samurai coffee machine fighting samurai zebra ride and polar bears.

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